Sharanagati

(from a talk of woman’s roles with Swami Tirtha, 13.08.2018, Ludashto)

(continued from the previous Friday)

Question of Krishnapriya: I would like to ask if it is better if a woman is alone, or if it’s better if she is in a connection? 

Swami Tirtha: Connection with God Supreme? 

Manjari: In a relationship.

Swami Tirtha: This is rasa, it is the best!

Ashvini: Sadhu Maharaj said: where relationship starts, problems start. But also: without а relationship, it’s difficult to progress in this material world.

Manjari: I’s like to share my personal opinion on this topic, and also the observation of people around me, that when a woman is alone for a long time, I mean for years, life forces her to develop more of а male energy and male qualities so that she’s able to cope. So she is either unhappy and lonely, missing a relationship, or she is okay, yet she feels far away from her intrinsic female nature. Therefore my opinion is that although it’s difficult to live together with a partner, still the female nature requires to be with someone, so that she can be a woman and feels good.

Swami Tirtha: And also they say: a man can behave as a man if he has a woman.

Shyama Tulasi: I think, since we are talking about relationships, it’s very important with whom this relationship is. We should not turn this being-in-a-relationship into an end in itself.

Chandrakanti: Even if a woman has to be alone for a long time, it’s better to wait for the proper man, or even to pray for a proper man, than to enter in whatever kind of connections simply not to be alone.

Adidevi: What I’ve felt when I’m away from my family is that a woman needs a protector. She feels best when she is in her family with her husband. But when this is missing, it’s best to have around her father or someone who is her protector, or to have a connection to God as a protector.

Hungarian Mataji: It is vital for a woman to take care for others. Even if she has no husband, to take care of her children or the elderly. Or someone who is around. That is vital for a woman. Without that, her life doesn’t make much sense.

Swami Tirtha: This is very important. I have a picture about that. It’s very beautiful. You don’t see it like this, but it’s very beautiful. This is Chamunda Devi, she is beheading herself. The blood is erupting from her neck. So it’s a charming beautiful picture. And these two young ladies by her side are drinking her blood. And they are standing over some copulating dead bodies. It is very difficult to read this picture. You might say: ‘Ah, this is horror and sex combined – horrible! Like an 18+ movie’. But what is the meaning?

The red body represents the Universal Mother. Decapitating means total self-sacrifice – give your life. Plus give your blood, give your energy, your consciousness to your daughters, who are drinking your blood. Usually in the oriental iconography the very fearful or negative pictures are telling the opposite story. For outsiders this is: ‘Ah! Some blood sacrifice or something horrible!’ But if you decipher the code, you will understand what it means. Do you feel sometimes that ‘Oh, I feel like I have totally lost my life. I have to fully sacrifice myself. I feel like these guys around me are just sucking my blood!” – don’t you feel like this sometimes? This is depicted here, and that is sacrifice.

So I fully agree. Service is absolutely a feminine dharma. In a very dignified sense again. There is an opera where there is one double-sided character – one side is a saintly woman, other side is like a demon. Her main business is to seduce monks. But in the second act she fails. In the third act, she has only one line: “Serve”. I like this opera very much. Why? Because we might have so many troubles and difficulties in our life, but if we know this secret, we shall never fail. 

(to be continued)