Sharanagati

Question: Gurudev mentioned that our ultimate goal is to go back to Godhead, but we are now in the material sphere, we have lots of duties to perform. The most basic duty is towards the family and this duty requires some affection…

Tirtha Maharaj: Some?! Not some! It requires much affection! Family life is for taming the wild animals. All those who are living in a wilderness, in a jungle, who are unable to express their love, they have to enter into a family – to become a little softer, a little tender, attentive. Family life is like a training. People have to be engaged. Family life is very good engagement for fifty years, practically without holidays. This is like a taming period. You have so many impulses, so much emotional outbursts, but somehow you have to control that, you have to learn how to control – this is family. So, it is not some affection, much affection is necessary to tame ourselves and to tolerate the others who are also in the taming process.

Question: If I understand correctly this duty has a beginning and an end, the family, and when it reaches its end, this affection is already there, so how do you get it back? What happens with this affection? Should it be abandoned, or what happens with it after the period of these duties is over?

Tirtha Maharaj: No, no. It is only the wild animals who do not know where my emotional contact belongs to. If your partner helps you to understand that all your feelings belong to the Supreme Lord, while you practice the process you will understand and you will reach the goal. So, it is not that you practice something and you discard it and then you achieve something – no! Meanwhile this is your path. While practicing you will understand how to dedicate it to God.

Let’s take the example of a bad marriage, because most of you would think of a good marriage when ‘my partner will help me to understand that all my feelings belong to God.’ Nicely preaching to me that: ‘Oh, my dear, you know that your affection belongs to the Supreme’. But what happens with a bad marriage? When my partner is just rejecting me all the time. ‘I come with flowers in the hands and she just kicks me in the ass.’ I think you understand what I mean. But even then your partner will help you to understand that this is not the human that you should worship with your emotions, but this is the Supreme. What do we worship in the human beings – this is the divine spark, this is atma and paramatma. And what do we worship in the Supreme Lord? This human aspect, that He is so gentle, He comes so close. So, while the process of this purifying the mind is going on, slowly we shall have a better picture. You remember this magic mantra which will fulfill your fate. Do you remember that? Do you want to hear? But, all those who have any material ambition, please don’t listen. This magic formula is like that: ‘My dear Lord, from this day on, I am Yours.’

If you really mean it, it will happen. ‘From this day on, I am Yours.’ So we don’t lose what we achieved, but it is fulfilled. It is like blossoming.

Question: Then what happens with the person next to us?

Tirtha Maharaj: Well, if our partner will tolerate us throughout this fifty years period, he will become a pure devotee. So he will immediately go to Goloka, Vaikuntha, whatever. Therefore, please, be very grateful when your partner gives you little headaches here and there. This is a way for you to become a holy person, saint.